The Art of Positive Thinking
You know the feeling. You're sitting at Thanksgiving dinner with grandparents, siblings, extended family, and cousins, looking forward to seeing your siblings who have moved out in different directions. The conversation’s going well; you’re all laughing and reminiscing about old times.
And then he starts – the relative who always has something negative to say. He's the complainer who has discontent written all over his face. In Yiddish we say that he has a ‘farbissinerpanim’. Nothing is ever good enough. He brings up old hurts and rivalries. The food isn't to his liking. He squabbles with everyone about everything. He sulks. He grumbles under his breath. He rolls his eyes as you speak. And of course, he’s always right and knows better.
Dinner is ruined. You can’t really put your finger on it but you are left with an awful taste in your mouth. It is the power of the negative that can extinguish your positive feelings and cast a shadow in the room.
If this is the picture of just one Thanksgiving meal, imagine what happens when children grow up with parents who are negative thinkers?
Inheriting Negativity
Pessimistic parents breed children who lack self-esteem. Finding fault, even in oneself, becomes second nature. These kids are so used to hearing ‘down thoughts’, it becomes difficult to see the good. Criticism and observing life through a ‘bad eye’ becomes a way of life. Nitpicking, sarcastic comments, and knocking each other contribute to sibling rivalry and fighting.
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